The Bay, 12/5/19

by **StevieA** » 13 May 2019, 14:18

: "The Bay", an unbroadcast pilot episode starring Padsta Tel (right) and StevieA

Local TV drama "The Bay" should have been about the exploits of local anglers but got sidetracked into a tragic yarn about teen love, drug dealing, and a horny cop. This is how the pilot episode should have played out:

During opening credits, we see novice angler Stevie casting woefully short from the beach. He dreams of one day fishing the channel from a boat, catching fat plaice and feisty smooth-hound.

Scene 1
Local hero and benefactor Terry (Padsta Tel) is checking the outboard on his open 16-footer when a begging message arrives from Stevie. ‘Cheeky git’, Terry mutters. ‘Then again,’ he muses aloud, ‘the forecast is for a gentle westerly and my 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5th choices for crew are unavailable.’ Bring worms, he messages, and I’ll see to the rest. We see his golden heart beating through a thick fleece smock.

Scene 2
Stevie is so excited he can barely sleep. He wakes before the alarm at 3.30am, makes a double lot of sandwiches and packs extra buns. ‘Just in case Terry forgets to bring any food for the 12-hour trip,’ he chortles.

Scene 3
Terry frowns as a grinding noise comes from the offside trailer wheel as he tows his boat through Lancaster. He should turn round and call off the trip, but can’t bear the thought of Stevie sobbing into his cornflakes. He gives a cavalier shrug and drives on.

Scene 4
5.15am. Green Street slipway. Stevie is standing up to his crotch in water, holding the boat while Terry casually laces up his comfy boots on dry land. Terry hops aboard and eventually gets the outboard going. As they motor across the placid bay, Stevie notices a pair of oars stashed among the fishing gear.

: Early start. Calm water, chilly air, cheerfully optimistic skipper.

Scene 5
Anglers shivering on the end of the Stone Jetty watch the boat go by. Stevie hides his face from their contemptuous stares. Before today, he too was a lowly shore angler.

Scene 6
They anchor in the channel and Terry hails a passing fishing boat on the assumption he knows the crew. He does. Terry knows everybody.

Scene 7
Novice Stevie has barely learnt to open the bale arm when casting with a fixed-spool reel, so he looks baffled when Terry presents him with two boat rods fitted with multipliers. Nevertheless, Stevie somehow lobs some bait in the water, untangles the overrun, then promptly pulls out a dogfish. Terry is unimpressed. Targeting smooth-hound, he doesn’t want to be plagued by doggies. Stevie, however, is delighted, grateful for any fish that lands at his feet. Unable to believe his luck, Stevie continues to pull out fish – bass, plaice and a feisty smooth-hound. Terry, fishing on the wrong side of the boat, looks bemused. His mood deepens when he discovers he has forgotten his sandwiches. Leave-it-to-beaver Stevie steps in to make up the shortfall.

: StevieA all the way. Smooth-hound early doors. Padsta Tel looks envious.

: Starry smooth-hound. You beauty.

: 1lb 8oz plaice

: Smooth operator.

Scene 8
Terry decides they (he) might do better a little further out. While Stevie hauls up the anchor, Terry pulls the outboard cord. Then again. And again. And again. Apart from the soft lapping of waves against the hull, there is silence. Stevie glances at the improvised rod-rest housing his constantly twitching rod and fears this may soon revert to its original function. Terry casually asks Stevie to drop the anchor again. They resume fishing. While Stevie wrestles a 7lb smooth-hound aboard, Terry tussles with the outboard. ‘Every problem has a solution,’ Terry says, without actually suggesting what that solution may be. Meanwhile, he bags a consolation plaice, then a curious double header.

: Plaice for Terry

: Odd couple

Scene 9
After prayers, the engine starts and Terry motors further out, cunningly ensuring that he now fishes from the ‘good’ side. While Stevie stares forlornly at his static rod tip, Terry whoops and hollers as he brings in a thornback followed by a series of smooth-hounds. ‘Best thing I’ve had between my legs in years,’ he says as he subdues a writhing smoothie between clenched thighs. During moments of respite, Terry phones fishing friends from Barrow to Blackpool, commiserating with their slow days and casually mentioning the 7-pounder he’s just caught.

: All smiles now as Terry bags a thornie

: As we were saying, all smiles.

: Yep, here comes another.

: ...and another...

: This is getting monotonous

: Enough already.

Scene 10
‘Just five more minutes,’ Stevie begs, baiting up a cocktail of frozen black, fresh lug, squid and crab legs in an increasingly desperate attempt to even the score. ‘Nope, we’re done,’ Terry says, firing up the outboard first-pull. Suddenly he can do no wrong.

: Padsta Tel at the end of the day, prematurely pleased as punch.

Scene 11
The twist in the tail. Back at the slipway, Terry almost kicks the noisy trailer wheel off its axle. It won’t get them fifty yards. Stevie wonders if that means they can turn the boat around and fish for another twelve hours. Terry gets on the phone. He knows everybody, and that includes next-door neighbour Kev, who promises to fit a new wheel bearing. Stevie, meanwhile, baits up a line in a final effort to catch something huge. He almost does – a jet ski – but it gets away. He gives up and watches the mechanics at work. Kev mentions that a new series of The Bay is in the works, and that the back alley behind the Royal is seeing plenty of action from fans trying to recreate its opening scene. Terry shakes his head. These days, he gets his thrills from smooth-hounds. Meanwhile, Stevie drifts into a dream-like reverie in which he stars in the sub-plot of the The Bay’s second series:
A local novice angler hijacks a fishing boat to hunt the elusive 25lb smooth-hound reputed to lurk in the abyss. As he bobs about on the swell, a huge fin appears behind him, carving purposefully toward the boat...

: Be careful what you wish for, Stevie.

Fade out.

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by **Padsta Tel** » 13 May 2019, 15:56

Wow Steve what a read just like the novel I asked you to write ITV want the film rights, it was a pleasure having your company and the catering was spot on , definitely a top post. :sos: